Last week I shared about one of Jacob’s really good days. It was before the time changed.
And then, new week, early sunrise, and he wasn’t having it! I would enter his bedroom to wake him up. He’d barely open his eyes and push me away. I’d give him time and space and later return to the same scenario. If he were to sit up or get out of bed, it was only to hand me his quilt and hold me tight until he heard these words, “okay, lie down and I’ll cover you up. But, only for a few more minutes.”
We were out of town, for three days, the weekend of the time change so Jacob automatically got to stay home with his sitter that Monday. Sometimes after being away from home for a few days, I just want to let him stay home with me. Blame it on those ‘good to get-away but better to be back’ feelings. It doesn’t take but a few days and I miss that dude terribly!! So, on Tuesday, I had decided IF he wakes up early, I’ll take him to his day program. But otherwise, we are staying home. And we did.
However, I felt missing two days when he wasn’t sick was enough time off and decided I’d get him up Wednesday to go. It did NOT work that way as our thoughts did NOT line up! I tried all the usual tactics and I couldn’t get him to stay up. Looking around his room, it was obvious he had played some during the night. So, I covered him in his quilt and closed his bedroom door to leave him alone. Quickly he was back sound asleep. Giving him a few hours, I woke him at 10 a.m. and by then he was ready to get up, (with me assuring him we weren’t going anywhere).
Thursday came and he had been home for 5 days, 3 of those missing his ‘school’. Three days that the weather was pleasant and he was well. I determined he was going. It wasn’t easy. Stalling every way he could. Making it hard to get him dressed. But at least he was finally upright! Mission accomplished and I dropped him off thinking all was well.
The Dance with Me (https://problemfreephilosophy.blog/2020/03/12/dance-with-me/) post went live that morning to positive and encouraging feedback. With friends and family celebrating Jacob having had such a great day.
That afternoon, my phone rang and it was the manager of his program. In short, ‘Jacob is fine but I wanted you to know about an incident.’ Oh goodness. My mind is racing. Did he swallow a dead lizard? Get his hand caught in a door? Get punched because he stole someone’s roll at lunch? (All have happened in the past.)
Seems Jacob and another fella wanted to be in the same spot. ‘That’s mine!’ ‘I was here first!’ Remember hearing that with your verbal toddlers?? Only what felt like a million times! Right? From my understanding, that sums up what happened. The problem was, neither could express themselves appropriately. Both did what they knew to do—grab and push to try and force the other to let them have their way.
Some time ago, we donated a couch and love seat to the center that Jacob attends. We were replacing ours at home and they agreed the furniture could be put to good use. So, Jacob’s office (https://problemfreephilosophy.blog/2019/08/01/step-into-my-offices/) got the couch and a common area got the love seat. Turns out, that day Jacob wanted to chill out on the love seat and so did T. I have no idea if Jacob believes those two couches belong to him, because he remembers we donated them, but seemed he was focused on the ‘that’s mine’ mindset.
So, two underweight, non-verbal fellas communicated in their language and ended up inflicting scratch marks on each other. “Do I need to come get him?” ’No, he is fine and in his room listening to music. I just wanted you to know what happened.’
Would it be entirely strange,
If we didn’t acknowledge the time change?
Some states said, enough is enough.
Spring forward, fall back is really rough.
My sweet boy can’t take it at first,
So sleeping in, for him, is a must.
He’ll adjust eventually, he always does.
Why are mornings so hard? Just b’cuz!
Was it the time change? I sure want to blame it on that! Oh, it saddened me. I was reliving Jacob’s best day because I’d just shared the story that morning. That phone call brought me down to reality. The staff handled it properly. But, when we picked him up, the young ladies waiting out front for their ride, scattered, telling me Jacob had been grabbing people that day. Afraid he might get too close to them, as well. Yes, I was pretty bummed out knowing he’d been a trouble maker. There are good days and not so good days. Thursday wasn’t his best day but everyday won’t be. And, that is normal!!
Apparently, I just needed a place to whine about the time change, thank you for allowing that. Lately there have been more good days than not, so that is a win!
Friday came and I didn’t have it in me to struggle with making him get up when he wasn’t ready. So we stayed home. Again. He only attended his program one day that week.
And now, Covid-19 is here and we are currently keeping him home as he doesn’t understand social distancing and has no concept of healthy hygiene habits. I know my guy isn’t going to complain about that!! However, I have a feeling my sanity may be stretched to new lengths.